When FD stays over on a week night – certain events unfold every morning.
My alarm goes off at 06h30 – I let out a little groan of protest, roll over giving FD a quick kiss before climbing out of bed and hitting the shower. I then get dressed, collect my hairdryer and hair straightner from my room where FD is still blissfully snoozing and take it to the lounge where I can make noise with free abandon. By then it’s about 07h00 - I gently wake up FD and we both go to the kitchen where he makes us fancy coffee with one of those coffee plunger thingums, and I make us muesli and yoghurt. We then take everything through to the lounge where I glance through the headlines on News24 on DSTV, wishing for some natural disaster that will stop me from going to work, before switching between VH1 and MTV which FD and I watch while ripping apart all the cheesy music videos until we have to go to work.
I’ve never thought about it much… until this morning. I had just put FD’s bowl of muesli in front of him when he jokingly said: “We’re like an old married couple with our morning routine”.
My heart skipped a beat. If there’s one thing that makes me freak out – it’s falling into a rut. In my head – the next step is the loss of passion, complete boredom, taking each other for granted and so on…
But is there a difference between falling into a routine and falling into a rut? The more I think about it, the more I realise that it’s impossible to not fall into some kind of routine when you spend a lot of time with someone. Is there such a thing as a good routine or is it always a bad thing?
Perhaps a rut is an inescapable routine – something that you want to break but don’t feel like you can – while a good routine can leave people feeling loved and secure.
Any thoughts?
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5 comments:
every day routines with meals is actually a nice secure comfy kind of thing... so don't stress too much about it... start pulling your hair out when you start finishing his sentences for him! i think it's inevitable that certain things, even sex on a certain level, becomes routine, THERE is the challenge though... cause it you don't do something about the sumthin~sumthin every now and again you can predict every single action before it happens... and that my dear is the beginning of the end...
you two are so kayoot together!
I think you hit it on the head with the comfort of some routines leaving you feeling loved and secure ... and actually breaking those routines may be more detrimental than not.
But rut's, the routines you cannot escape from but desperately want to, are definitely a slow death for any relationship.
Naah, none functioning mornings are perfect for routine. You don't have to think and it just flows.
You'd have a morning routine anyways wouldn't you? It's the way to get through the morning ;)
Oh come on. It is what you make it, hun. Routine can be just that. Routine. If you turn it into a rut, that's exactly what it will be. Keep it spicy, girlie!
Your morning routine is the same as any other normal daily routine: getting into work and making a cup of coffee before checking your e-mails, stopping past the shop twice a week on the way home to buy bread - whatever is necessary really to keep your day running smoothly. Start worrying when you're unable to have anything but muesli for breakfast, or you turn that tv up really loud cos you have nothing to discuss, not even to rip those videos to shreds!
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