First of all – thanks to everyone for the comments. Your words definitely help put things into perspective and helped me make out the downward spiral I was about to leap into.
I’m happy to report that both FD and I have recovered from the events that unfolded last week. As clichéd as it sounds, I’ve taken a lot away from the drama of last Friday. I’ve realised that one of the most beautiful things about our relationship is that we don’t ever try and control each other – so to try and stop FD from doing something he really wants to do can only be counterproductive. My only reason for ever trying to stop him from doing these wild things was concern for his safety – which boils down to me not ever wanting to imagine him not being in my life. Stopping him from embarking on all the mad adventures his heart longs for is a sure fire way of ensuring that one day him and I will part ways. Of all the vices a man can have – FDs ‘wanderlust’ as Lopz so aptly described it, is hardly a problem at all.
Moving on!!
I can’t believe how many young South Africans are flocking out of the country all of a sudden! In the past few weeks, I’ve had to digest the news that Kay, Aye and BMXer are all leaving the country in the near future. BMXer phoned me en route to the airport to say that he’s decided to move to Scotland, Aye is off to Germany after a series of several dramatic twists and turns in her life and Kay decided a few weeks ago that she’s in need of a new and environment and some adventure and is heading off to do the London thing.
South Africa has certainly had it’s fair share of problems in the past few months – with some losing a little hope and faith in the powers that be – but I don’t think this has much to do with everyone’s decision to leave all of a sudden. I think it’s got a lot more to do with the weird stage of our lives my friends and I are entering into. Suddenly partying like a mad thing is only fun once in a while, friends are beginning to settle down around us and our jobs are no longer just jobs, they’re potential careers. The big 3 0 is approaching rapidly and we’re all feeling a little unnerved.
Do we like the direction we’re headed? Sadly, I think the answer for most is no. And I’m no exception. Certain aspects of my life are exactly as I want them to be – but others are severely lacking. Going overseas and heading into a completely new and fresh environment means that all that can be changed... but can the same be done while staying on home ground? I think it can happen, but it’s a lot harder as old routine makes it easy for us to play out the same day over and over.
I’m sensing big changes are on the horizon... and I’m quite excited to see exactly how it’s all going to play out!
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3 comments:
so glad that it doesn't sound as if you're also moving away! my thirties are very liberating, nice place to be, so settle down and enjoy your man, the horizon is holding good things sweetie ;)
Yeah I don't think SA is heading into doom and gloom. JZ is quite a likeable character, really (when he isn't showering with hookers or dealing with corrupt arms dealers).
My question for those that head off is one of sustainability. If you can't make a life here, what makes you so sure that running away to start somewhere new would change that? You gotta emigrate for the right reasons - it is one major decision. And I'm glad that I can leave a major decision like that to Future Wiggly, and let Present Wiggly enjoy the great things this country has to offer.
So glad to hear it worked out hun. And where are you these days???? Too loved up to blog hey! ;-)
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