A couple of weeks ago, caught up in the usual spirit of 'new beginnings' that grips the world for approximately 21 days following New Year's - I decided to give something a little bit 'out-there' a try. I decided it was time to start pole dancing.
Over the past year or so, pole dancing seems to have become a completely acceptable form of exercise for many a young Jo'burg lass - in fact, being young isn't even a requirement anymore. I'd heard many reports of just how fantastic it was for improving your 'core' (what ever that is, because every new exercise technique they've come out with over the past five years has apparently been amazing for cores).
Spurred on by a friend, who even at her most wild moments is about ten thousand times more conservative than the Queen - I decided to sign up for Pole dancing 101.
We arrived at the studio in Rivonia to find what looked like a normal dance studio, if you don't take the 10 poles into consideration. The teacher was already walking around with a fistful of cash getting money from slightly terrified looking newbies. She came up to me and for a mad moment I wondered whether I should hand the money to her or tuck it into her jeans as a really pathetic joke. Fortunately I opted for the former.
The teacher, who is apparently an ex stripper who's stripped at strip bars all over the world, then walking over to her iPod docking station - pressed play and proceeded to strip down to her g-string. I was glad to discover that this was only because she was changing into her shorts - and that none of us were actually expected to follow suit.
Then she began showing us the moves - step by step - slide your left hand up to the top of the pole... hook your right knee around it... bring your left knee up and slowly...very slowly... lower yourself to the ground while spinning around the pole... until you land gracefully on your knees... No problem.
Try and imagine Demi Moore in Strip Tease..... I was the exact OPPOSITE of that. Oh. My. God.
I think watching Schalk Burger pole dancing would probably have been sexier than what I was managing to achieve. It was carnage on the strip floor.
And what made it SO much worse was that everyone else was totally getting it! My friend, the Queen, was practically supporting herself with one toe while spinning around and tossing her hair about. It was devastating.
So like some of the other experiments from former years - like scuba diving, salsa dancing and internet dating - pole dancing is just another activity that's been canned without achieving anything other than a blog post - better than nothing I guess!
Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Talkin' money
It's virtually impossible to have a 20 minute conversation with someone without the words 'recession', 'economic slump' or 'hard time's coming up. This has led me to ponder all things money-related. To be truthful - I'm a bit of a money fool. My brain just switches off as soon as someone starts talking about investments or the stock exchange. I can't even handle reading my bank's website for more than a couple of minutes while trying to work out what type of savings or investment account I should open. I barely understand any of the terminology - and that's after FD and my dad have spent hours trying to explain it all to me.
Thankfully, despite my complete inability to compute all things financial, I don't have a cent of debt. Knowing what I'm capable of, I've never let myself own a credit card, which has helped me to steer clear of doing too much damage. I don't even believe in owning department store accounts - which has created all sorts of problems when trying to set up even my 3G account with my cellphone provider - with zero credit history to work from.
I came across this article on women24.com - the mistakes that women make when it comes to money and found it quite interesting. There are definitely some enormous generalisations here, but I can see quite a lot of truth in it too - what do you guys think? Do you think men are just born with more of an aptitude when it comes to cash, or is it something they learn as they go along? Or do you reckon the whole lot of it is a load of crap and that women are just as financially savvy?
Thankfully, despite my complete inability to compute all things financial, I don't have a cent of debt. Knowing what I'm capable of, I've never let myself own a credit card, which has helped me to steer clear of doing too much damage. I don't even believe in owning department store accounts - which has created all sorts of problems when trying to set up even my 3G account with my cellphone provider - with zero credit history to work from.
I came across this article on women24.com - the mistakes that women make when it comes to money and found it quite interesting. There are definitely some enormous generalisations here, but I can see quite a lot of truth in it too - what do you guys think? Do you think men are just born with more of an aptitude when it comes to cash, or is it something they learn as they go along? Or do you reckon the whole lot of it is a load of crap and that women are just as financially savvy?
Friday, January 23, 2009
Yorkie-fever
Is it weird that I'm considering moving to a new apartment just so I can get one of these...??
I'm a serious Yorkshire Terrier fan. The obsession started with my first Yorkie when I was about twelve years ago. She was classic Yorkie - she would only sit in the front seat of the car and would only eat roast chicken from Woolworths (we tried Pick 'n Pay but she was having none of it). She had so many fans her popularity pretty much reached cult status. She lived until she was about 15, which is seriously good going by Yorkie standards (which might say something about the health benefits of Woolies free range chicken!)
I always knew I'd get another Yorkie - it was just a matter of waiting until the right time. Then, while at the coast this December I was quite literally bombarded by Yorkies. It was a Yorkie-fest. Everyone in the world seemed to have one except for me, and it made me start to question why the hell not? I work from home now, so I wouldn't have to leave it alone for long periods of time - and I have parents who can dog sit when I go away (they don't sound too keen on this, but they'll succumb eventually).
But a fairly significant obstacle remains - a zero pet policy at my complex. And I have the neighbours from hell that will definitely kick up a stink the first time they hear a bark. Yup... they'd boot me out even if my yorkie had a face like this...
(unthinkable..... I know)For the record... this has absolutely nothing to do with general broodiness - this is purely about the Yorkies. So time will tell, but I'm holding thumbs that I may find myself Yorkie-friendly during the course of 2009.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Some cheering up!
I’ve been feeling pretty down all week so I decided it was time for some cheering up. I know… I know, I’m supposed to be Jewish, so I shouldn’t be doing things like this… But since I’m completely non-practicing, I gotta choose something to celebrate – and what better than CHRISTMAS!
I made sure that it wasn’t an overly religious tree… although the angels were super cute, I forced myself to walk right past them and went straight for the non-denominational decorations. It’s all bells, bows, bobbles and mini presents for my tree…
So here it is in all its glory… my very first ever non-denominational Christmas Tree!!!
Monday, November 3, 2008
Saturday night...
So Saturday night was most probably the scariest night of my life.
FD and I had spent the evening with some of his friends – we had an early dinner at News Café and then headed back to their spot for coffee and a look at a video they had made from their holiday in France. We left at about 10ish and decided to head back to FD’s house to feed his dog before heading back to my place.
We were happily chatting, driving pretty slowly along Old Pretoria Rd when suddenly an old white Toyota swerved out of its lane, straight into oncoming traffic at full speed just metres ahead of us. FD had a split second response to try and dodge him by turning to the left – but it was too late, there was no time – and all I could think was “Oh my god – this can’t be how it ends” before feeling the shockwave of impact as the car slammed into us.
I felt strange – I realised that I felt more or less okay, and I was aware that FD was talking next to me so I realised that he was probably alright too. And then suddenly my chest felt like it was constricting and I felt a sharp pain shooting through my lower back. I leapt out of the car – and slowly my chest felt like it was beginning to ease. Then I started to panic – why was FD not out of the car? I started yelling to him and ran towards the car – and finally he climbed out. Although I could see he was walking around and talking I felt terrified that he wasn’t okay despite his best attempts to assure me he was. I then looked towards the Toyota that had slammed into us and saw that the whole front of the car was compacted and the windscreen had cracked and there was no movement from inside. I was sure that who ever was driving the car was dead. But then the door opened and out climbed a woman carrying a small child who was crying – both bleeding. They sat down on the side of the road and eventually the driver got out – his face covered in blood.
Other people had stopped and were trying to see if we were okay – everyone phoning emergency services. A few short minutes later the road was teeming with paramedics, tow truck drivers, police and even a fire truck. FD’s car (a month old) was in bad shape. And a look inside was even scarier – his entire steering wheel had bent backwards – and we still aren’t sure which part of his body caused it. The pain in my chest was simply from the seatbelt doing it’s job – which has left red, black and blue welts across my chest, stomach and hips. My only other injury is a bruised coccyx which sucks to sit on. FD just needed a couple of stitches in his arm. And that’s honestly the worst of it. I still can’t believe that we’re both almost perfectly okay.
And now I feel really strange. First of all – I feel this need to check on FD constantly. I’m sure it’ll pass, but today has been a challenge. I keep wanting to phone him to make sure that everything’s okay – but have managed to resist it with the exception of one call.
I also keep reliving the moment when we saw the car swerving towards us – the feeling of panic is inexplicable – especially with the person I care about most in the world sitting right next to me directly in the line of fire. I keep on going through the ‘what ifs’ in my head… ‘what if we had left a few minutes later’.... ‘what if FD hadn’t managed to turn a little to the left’…. ‘what if we had been going faster’…It’s the strangest mix of gratituity and anger… glad we’re both fine and then mad that it had to happen at all.
Most of all it’s the scary realisation that everything can change in a heartbeat. Lucky for us we both walked away – but so many people don’t. And FD and I had spent most of Saturday bickering about random shite – what if that had been our last day on this earth, totally wasted worrying about utter nonsense? It’s a good wake up call because as clichéd as it’s become, I really realise how important it is to let the small stuff go and focus instead on what’s positive and light.
FD and I had spent the evening with some of his friends – we had an early dinner at News Café and then headed back to their spot for coffee and a look at a video they had made from their holiday in France. We left at about 10ish and decided to head back to FD’s house to feed his dog before heading back to my place.
We were happily chatting, driving pretty slowly along Old Pretoria Rd when suddenly an old white Toyota swerved out of its lane, straight into oncoming traffic at full speed just metres ahead of us. FD had a split second response to try and dodge him by turning to the left – but it was too late, there was no time – and all I could think was “Oh my god – this can’t be how it ends” before feeling the shockwave of impact as the car slammed into us.
I felt strange – I realised that I felt more or less okay, and I was aware that FD was talking next to me so I realised that he was probably alright too. And then suddenly my chest felt like it was constricting and I felt a sharp pain shooting through my lower back. I leapt out of the car – and slowly my chest felt like it was beginning to ease. Then I started to panic – why was FD not out of the car? I started yelling to him and ran towards the car – and finally he climbed out. Although I could see he was walking around and talking I felt terrified that he wasn’t okay despite his best attempts to assure me he was. I then looked towards the Toyota that had slammed into us and saw that the whole front of the car was compacted and the windscreen had cracked and there was no movement from inside. I was sure that who ever was driving the car was dead. But then the door opened and out climbed a woman carrying a small child who was crying – both bleeding. They sat down on the side of the road and eventually the driver got out – his face covered in blood.
Other people had stopped and were trying to see if we were okay – everyone phoning emergency services. A few short minutes later the road was teeming with paramedics, tow truck drivers, police and even a fire truck. FD’s car (a month old) was in bad shape. And a look inside was even scarier – his entire steering wheel had bent backwards – and we still aren’t sure which part of his body caused it. The pain in my chest was simply from the seatbelt doing it’s job – which has left red, black and blue welts across my chest, stomach and hips. My only other injury is a bruised coccyx which sucks to sit on. FD just needed a couple of stitches in his arm. And that’s honestly the worst of it. I still can’t believe that we’re both almost perfectly okay.
And now I feel really strange. First of all – I feel this need to check on FD constantly. I’m sure it’ll pass, but today has been a challenge. I keep wanting to phone him to make sure that everything’s okay – but have managed to resist it with the exception of one call.
I also keep reliving the moment when we saw the car swerving towards us – the feeling of panic is inexplicable – especially with the person I care about most in the world sitting right next to me directly in the line of fire. I keep on going through the ‘what ifs’ in my head… ‘what if we had left a few minutes later’.... ‘what if FD hadn’t managed to turn a little to the left’…. ‘what if we had been going faster’…It’s the strangest mix of gratituity and anger… glad we’re both fine and then mad that it had to happen at all.
Most of all it’s the scary realisation that everything can change in a heartbeat. Lucky for us we both walked away – but so many people don’t. And FD and I had spent most of Saturday bickering about random shite – what if that had been our last day on this earth, totally wasted worrying about utter nonsense? It’s a good wake up call because as clichéd as it’s become, I really realise how important it is to let the small stuff go and focus instead on what’s positive and light.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Ahoy!
Sometimes it's hard to blog. Either nothing too eventful is going on.... or sometimes life is far too eventful and the brain gets too jumbled trying to put it down into words. I guess the past couple of weeks have been a bit of both. There have been huge changes - ie. leaving crappy consumer mag and going freelance... but things have, for the most part, being going along pretty swimmingly. Without going into too much details... the highlight without a doubt was finally using that free trip to Pezula.... in the words of Gok from BBC Lifestyle's 'How to look good naked'.... GAAAAAWJIS! (To be said with huge emphasis on the AWWWWW)....
I insisted on a fire every night, even though it was hot outside and we had to put the air-con on full to negate the effect...
Scenes from our canoe trip along Noetzie River...
So here are a couple of pics....
Awesome driftwood art thingie on Swartvlei Beach...
Our bathroom at Pezula - complete with freestanding bath overlooking an atrium
First thing we did was order mojitos at the pool...
I insisted on a fire every night, even though it was hot outside and we had to put the air-con on full to negate the effect... FD digging his shower cap
Scenes from our canoe trip along Noetzie River...GOOD TIMES!!!
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